Sent to several friends:
Hello and Happy first Sunday of Advent!! I hope all is going well for you! But I write to tell you about a small adventure of mine today. As some of you know, and some of you may not, this summer I made a foolish attempt to walk to Oklahoma from Wichita. Well, it was a very cool journey seeing nature and kindness in action in addition to spending the night in a post office, but I only made it as far as Conway Springs. oh poop.
But today, on Dec. 3 in the Jubilee Year of 2000 (actually I'm not really sure about that, cuz I think the Church's new year starts with Advent, so I'm not sure if this is technically still the "Jubilee year", anyone care to clear this up?) Anyway, today I walked, skipped, danced, sang, and prayed my way to Oklahoma. It was lots of fun, and I'm sure if someone had been secretly videotaping me I could have made clearance into Charter. From Ark City to the border is about 3-5 miles and it took me about an hour and a half.
I saw three, count them-THREE historical markers that celebrated the pioneers stealing the Cherokee Strip from the Native Americans, and I was also stopped by one police man guy. On my way back I'd stopped to sit on a bridge and admire the Arkansas River, and apparently I "scared a woman to death" thinking I was going to commit suicide. Luckily, I contained my laughter until after the cop had left.
I hope you have a super duper day.
inCHRIST,
joel isaac
p.s. Oh yeah, I forgot about one other "stupidity of joel" moment. At the very beginning of my walk, I found an All Sport bottle that still had some stuff in it. NO! I DID NOT DRINK IT!! I know what you're thinking and I'm not that stupid but I did stomp on it, thinking how cool it would be to watch the juice spray out AWAY from me. Well, things don't quite happen that way, liquid always gravitates towards my pants. grrrrr...
What a jackass.
Remember Charter? Remember All Sport?
I hope you have a super duper day.
Friday, December 9, 2011
October 2000- Prophetic Words
another email to Jackie:
Thank you. Thank you for last night and for the rides and my scapular and for our walk in the field and digging in the dirt with me.
I am always there for you. Always in heart. And where I fail, Christ never will. He should be your standard, not me. Gosh, I hope you don't end up with a weirdo like me.
Frankly, I am amazed that she fell for me. I mean, seriously, these emails? Let this be hope to all hopelessly nerdy guys out there: you too can win the girl of your dreams by mere faith alone.
Thank you. Thank you for last night and for the rides and my scapular and for our walk in the field and digging in the dirt with me.
I am always there for you. Always in heart. And where I fail, Christ never will. He should be your standard, not me. Gosh, I hope you don't end up with a weirdo like me.
Frankly, I am amazed that she fell for me. I mean, seriously, these emails? Let this be hope to all hopelessly nerdy guys out there: you too can win the girl of your dreams by mere faith alone.
September 2000-Happy Birthday, Angela
from another email to Jackie:
There is a reason for everything. I know I am here for a purpose. I have my mission. He knows what he is about.
Cowley-hmmph. It sure is interesting here. I am keeping very busy. VERY BUSY. Braums is going well, there are a handful of people I really enjoy working with and there are those that are way too affected by the small town metnatlity. Sex is everywhere I go, it cannot be escaped. Virgins are by far in the minority. I've almost finished training at Dillons. My first real day is on Saturday. I had to do this computer training inspector game, where I would walk through a store, spot problems and click on the correct solution. If I miss the problem, and accident happens, which was usually quite humorous, such as the little toddler boy falling out of a cart. hee hee. But anyways, there was this girl that appeared to be eating strawberry jam straight from the jar and had it all over her face. I clicked "Give advice" which is a nice way of saying "Hey moo-ron! Stop chowing down on the jam!" Then she fell over and died, apparently the strawberry jam was blood. Silly me.
I was cast in the musical, Annie Get Your Gun. I'm Chief Sitting Bull-certainly not a huge part in any sense of the word. My entire tribe has been decimated in rewrites, so I'm a little bummed that I've lost all my squaws. But the show is going to be sensational, I hope you can come, I think it is the first weekend of Nov.
Sunday was my first day teaching PSR down here. I'm not sure if I told you, but I am now teaching the 5th and 6th graders down here, not the high schoolers. My kids were all extremely quiet and I didn't have textbooks to work with yet. alas! It will get better. With my jobs I decided not to do PSR at Winfield too, so Angela will be flying solo.
Speaking of Angela, Tuesday was her birthday, so I took her to Walmart and gave her a parade. Ok, please try to picture this, cuz me and Angela were laughing our bums off. Angela in a clown costume with a bright orange hunting mask, wearing goat poop yellow shoes in a cart full of pillows decorated with fake flowers and a silver hula hoop. Joel pushes her around the store while singing the birthday song:
Today is her birthday, yes it is! yes it is!
Her name is Angela and today she is 19
and her phone number is 524-5591!
while Angela keeps beat with a Barbie bicycle bell.
ahhh...good times, good times.
They were good times. I think I might be able to tolerate the Joel in this email. Sure, a little stupid, but it was intentionally stupid to bring joy to others. And this was one of the rare times where I did not take the idiocy too far. For reasons I do not understand, at this time in my life I relished the strange looks I got from people. Yeah yeah yeah, I'm sure this was driven by a level of needing attention that bordered on desperate. But a big part of it was just wanting to be funny, and willing to utilize methods...shall we euphemistically call them "unorthodox and daring"? - to bring about laughs. But, let's be generous and say that 50 percent of those attempts at humor led to legitimate joy for my friends. We always prided ourselves on not needing alcohol to have a fun time. We were drunk on joy. And stupidity.
There is a reason for everything. I know I am here for a purpose. I have my mission. He knows what he is about.
Cowley-hmmph. It sure is interesting here. I am keeping very busy. VERY BUSY. Braums is going well, there are a handful of people I really enjoy working with and there are those that are way too affected by the small town metnatlity. Sex is everywhere I go, it cannot be escaped. Virgins are by far in the minority. I've almost finished training at Dillons. My first real day is on Saturday. I had to do this computer training inspector game, where I would walk through a store, spot problems and click on the correct solution. If I miss the problem, and accident happens, which was usually quite humorous, such as the little toddler boy falling out of a cart. hee hee. But anyways, there was this girl that appeared to be eating strawberry jam straight from the jar and had it all over her face. I clicked "Give advice" which is a nice way of saying "Hey moo-ron! Stop chowing down on the jam!" Then she fell over and died, apparently the strawberry jam was blood. Silly me.
I was cast in the musical, Annie Get Your Gun. I'm Chief Sitting Bull-certainly not a huge part in any sense of the word. My entire tribe has been decimated in rewrites, so I'm a little bummed that I've lost all my squaws. But the show is going to be sensational, I hope you can come, I think it is the first weekend of Nov.
Sunday was my first day teaching PSR down here. I'm not sure if I told you, but I am now teaching the 5th and 6th graders down here, not the high schoolers. My kids were all extremely quiet and I didn't have textbooks to work with yet. alas! It will get better. With my jobs I decided not to do PSR at Winfield too, so Angela will be flying solo.
Speaking of Angela, Tuesday was her birthday, so I took her to Walmart and gave her a parade. Ok, please try to picture this, cuz me and Angela were laughing our bums off. Angela in a clown costume with a bright orange hunting mask, wearing goat poop yellow shoes in a cart full of pillows decorated with fake flowers and a silver hula hoop. Joel pushes her around the store while singing the birthday song:
Today is her birthday, yes it is! yes it is!
Her name is Angela and today she is 19
and her phone number is 524-5591!
while Angela keeps beat with a Barbie bicycle bell.
ahhh...good times, good times.
They were good times. I think I might be able to tolerate the Joel in this email. Sure, a little stupid, but it was intentionally stupid to bring joy to others. And this was one of the rare times where I did not take the idiocy too far. For reasons I do not understand, at this time in my life I relished the strange looks I got from people. Yeah yeah yeah, I'm sure this was driven by a level of needing attention that bordered on desperate. But a big part of it was just wanting to be funny, and willing to utilize methods...shall we euphemistically call them "unorthodox and daring"? - to bring about laughs. But, let's be generous and say that 50 percent of those attempts at humor led to legitimate joy for my friends. We always prided ourselves on not needing alcohol to have a fun time. We were drunk on joy. And stupidity.
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